Do Christian Women Think About Sex? (weird emails, creepy google searches, hate mail! it's all here, folks!!!)

So, it's been a fun week on ye olde blog. Hate mail, weird google searches, creepy stalker types asking me to be their "fun, exciting friend." I thought I'd share some of this stuff with you.
THIS WEEK'S GOOGLE SEARCHES:
  1. "Do Christian women think about sex?" Nope. We don't. Also, we never fart, sweat or have stinky feet.
  2. "Does the Catholic Church use the Holy Spirit anymore?" Nope. We used up the Holy Spirit years ago. We use the Holy Ghost now.
  3. "Is Kai Ryssdal liberal or conservative?" Darn those journalists who take their journalism seriously! We demand to know which "side" he's on!!
  4. "Wife spanking story." Uhhhhhh. I only get spanked on my birthday.

I would also like to take a moment and share a few excerpts from the wonderful, "I'm-concerned-for-your-soul" emails I've been getting in the last month complete with grammatical errors (my comments are in parentheses):

FROM 'OCMOM' : One thing I do know is that neither God or the Holy Spirit lead you to post this blog... (well, that's odd. Because I totally checked in with Jesus and He was all good with my blog!) I would ask you to spend some time in prayer and ask God what he thinks about what you have written  (thank you...Mom? I will also write 50 sentences that say: "I will always laugh at emails from complete strangers who claim to have insider knowledge about what God wants on my blog.")

FROM "H.": What I was trying to find out from you was your purpose for writing this story. Do you think that what you wrote was edifying to the Lord? Did you consider that it might stumble baby Christians? (Actually, my purpose-driven blog was written to edify myself and stumble full-grown Christians. But you were sooooo close! Better luck next time!)

FROM "L": I just have to say that the doctrine of purgatory is a heresy. There are so many heresies in the Catholic religion. It's just another cult, albeit a huge one. I apologize for all this unsolicited advise. (I just have to say that the doctrine of apologizing for giving unsolicited advice is a heresy. True believers keep unsolicited advice to themselves so they don't have to apologize for it later. But hey, what do I know? I'm just a member of the hugest cult on planet Earth!!)

So, there ya go!!!! ISN'T BLOGGING LIKE TOTALLY AWESOME????

SmartAsseryelizabeth-34 Comments